A few highlights from my week spent teaching the alphabet to 5th graders and telling time to 6th graders.

•Repeating “What Time Is It?” endlessly and getting the Hamilton soundtrack stuck in my head on repeat for two weeks (What time is it? SHOWTIME Like I said….)

•Letting the 5th graders pick their own team names and finding out days later that team tama tama just means “team ballsack,” which I repeated multiple times in class. *shakes fist to the sky* They got me this time.

•Accidentally leading the 6th Graders in a Nazi salute while teaching clock gestures.

•Dropping my teaching materials on telling time and watching them scatter around the room. Crack myself up (and no one else) by saying “My, how time flies!” RIP, gold star pun, you were too good for this world.

•Waiting to buy omiyage until the last minute at the train station halfway home from Kyoto. Realizing later that the package says “Nagoya” in Kanji. Have friendly coworkers ask for a week what I thought of Nagoya. Waffle between trying to explain in broken Japanese that I went to Kyoto (making them think I really am just incredibly, incredibly confused all the time) or just agreeing that Nagoya really is lovely this time of year.

•Being included in a formal school photo for one of my school’s 60th anniversary celebrations.

•Eating lunch in the formal dining room with the 2nd graders. Stare in disbelief as the clock splits in half on the hour, plays a tinny version of “My Heart Will Go On” as each half-face spins in its own circle before closing together seamlessly like nothing happened. Wondering  afterward if someone slipped acid in the udon.